The Prankiest Prank That Ever Pranked|| CLOSED

[cordeux]

Once she was off work, Iris decided to swing by the shops in Diagon Alley to try and get some ideas for holiday gifts. Christmas was only two months away and she hardly had any of it done. With the way shoppers got the closer it was to the holidays, she wanted to get it over and done with while avoiding being crushed under a massive stampede of customers. She was wondering what to get her father as a bit of a gag gift, contemplating one of the ugliest scarves she had ever seen in a nearby shop window, when her eyes alighted on the famed Weasley twins’ joke shop.

Of course! Why hadn’t she thought of it sooner? The best place to shop for a gag gift was, obviously, at a joke shop, and they had plenty of other things besides. She could probably get a whole slew of shopping down in one stop and save herself loads of trouble. She might as well see how the twins were doing anyway. She remembered them from Oliver’s team, the two beaters who were always getting in her way while she was ducking and weaving and trying to get the quaffle through one of the goals. While they frustrated her to no end on the pitch, she did think they were brilliant and quite funny.

With a bounce to her step, Iris pushed open the door to the shop and stepped in, immediately overwhelmed by the sheer amount of joke products lining the shelves and in little display cases on the sales floor. She was immediately attracted to the floating little puffs she saw near the front door and tried to imagine how Mr. Whiskers would react if she brought one home. Just when she was trying to figure out how, exactly, she was going to find anything, she spotted a bit of red hair bobbing around which was, sure enough, attached to a Weasley twin.

“Hey!” She waved him over with a grin. “Is this Gred or Forge? I’m trying to figure out what I should buy for my da and a couple of friends, and before you say anything, “the entire store” is not the proper answer.”

[george]

you spin me right 'round, baby, right 'round

"Why not?" George asked as he weaved his way through display cases and shelves to make it over to the brunette. He grinned and wagged his eyebrows at her. "It would make everyone happy in the end, wouldn't it? You buy the whole shop, then I'm happy, the people you're buying for are happy. Win, win!" He stopped right in front of her, studying her face. He knew her from somewhere before, which was even more strongly stated after she had asked if he was Gred or Forge. "We went to school together, didn't we?" The face was familiar, but George just could not place a finger on it. He must not have seen her for awhile.

"Hmmm," he murmured as he cupped his chin, turning this way and that, taking in her features. "Quidditch, I believe. You weren't on Gryffindor, but you were on another team. Definitely not Slytherin, too pretty for that, and I don't know if you seem like a Hufflepuff." He grinned and then snapped his fingers, a figurative light coming on above his head. "Ravenclaw, right?"

He plucked a pygmy and then held it out in his hand. It was bright pink and it screamed girly. "I'm sure your da will love this. He'll melt the instant he sees it. My da did, you should give it a go." Yes, now that he had placed her in Ravenclaw and on a Quidditch team, he was positive it was coming back to him. "Oh, I know. You were in Oliver's year, Ravenclaw, on the Quidditch team!" He felt so proud of himself. Ravenclaws weren't the only ones who could be damn smart. He was good looking, and a genius. Dang, his mum must be so proud of him.

"Sorry. Pretty face, but no name to go with it. I feel like an oaf."

He wondered what he should show her. She was from Ravenclaw, so obviously she might want something smart. Oh, but she had said what she was shopping for was a gift for her da, so that meant that he didn't have to try and find something she would like. She just had to find something her da would like. And a couple of friends, he reminded himself. He kept forgetting. He looked around his shop, studying it with a critical eye. "What kind of things does your da and friends usually like?" He could go from there with advice about what to get.

Today had been a slow day, so he had some time to spare to help her out. Especially if she was a former player on an opposing team. He would love to tease her and talk about how much more amazing his team was. He liked to rile people up when it came to Quidditch. They always got in such a huff when you played around with insulting their team, or if they weren't on a team then their favorite team. He shoved his hands into his pockets, studying her face as he waited for her reply.

Words: 507 | Notes: SUCKAAAA |

[cordeux]

“It’s Iris,” she laughed and brought the pygmy puff close to her face, examining the tiny thing. It certainly was cute, though she was worried about what her mum would think if she brought one of those things home for her father. She was still trying to settle into the fact that both her daughter and husband could use magic, so having a magical little creature around could possibly send her into hysterics. Unless she told her mother it was a new type of technology… That was brilliant! She didn’t bother bursting out with it, knowing George probably wouldn’t have any clue as to what she was talking about. “I was the Ravenclaw chaser, yes. You knocked a damned bludger into my head during seventh year. I nearly throttled you, except later I found you slipping some of those puking pastils to Roger Bloomingfield, who I absolutely bloody hated.”

She grinned and stuck the pygmy on her shoulder, deciding to buy it just to see the look on her father’s face. He would get a kick out of it, and she would tell her mother a little white lie to keep the two of them happy. “Er, he usually likes things that he can use to play tricks on other people,” Iris told him. “You know, like putting catsup on his finger and pretending he stabbed it with his fork. Then I have this friend who can be a real dunderhead when it comes to romance. You wouldn’t happen to have any of those love potions, would you? That would be a laugh.”

“You know, as snazzy as you look in that outfit, I think I prefer the maroon and gold Quidditch robes on you,” she winked at him. “Matches your hair a bit better.”

She wandered around behind him, looking at all the various products they passed. A few of them looked absolutely terrifying while others she saw made her wish she’d had them while she was in school. She was usually rather tame, but some of the other students in her year… Well, they would have deserved it if someone slipped them some of the candies and things the Weasley twins produced. The shop must have been the wonder of Hogwarts students and a must-see place, especially first years. The jokesters usually became more tame around the years when O.W.L.’s started. Everyone had hopes and dreams, after all, and most wanted to study and do their best on the tests.

"I will agree with the oaf part," she added, a teasing grin on her lips.

[george]

you spin me right 'round, baby, right 'round

"I knocked a bludger at a pretty girl like you?" George pretended to be shocked and horrified, placing his hand over where his heart was. "Why, I never." Grinning, he studied her with the pgymy puff. It was obvious she had decided to get it. Chuckling, he nodded towards it. "It likes you. It might not want to go to your father after that." Shaking his head, he motioned for her to follow him. "Let me show you around. As a way to say sorry for all those amazingly aimed bludgers, of course."

He walked towards the back of the store, where the register was, and turned so he could wave his arms to encompass the whole store. "This is the beautiful Weasley Wizard Wheezes," he said in a loud, authoritive voice. He was attempting his hardest to imitate an informative announcer who would lead a group of people touring an area. It would have been a very good pretend tour guide, except he kept grinning and snickering as he continued. "Founded just earlier this year, it has been in existance in the minds of the Weasley twins since their creation."

He walked forward and motioned towards some love potions. "This, my dear, is something you could get a love sick friend who wishes the boy of her choice would care for her back." He turned to wink at her. "Not that that person would be you, of course." Turning away from her, he strode off once more; pointing out the stacks of better formatted whoopee cushions. "They disappear as soon as someone sits on them," he explained. "So if anyone tries to say No, it wasn't me! they have no proof! Brilliant, right? Fred thought of it first, but of course I helped slip the idea in there."

He stopped walking and turned to her. "Who else might you be shopping for? A boyfriend, perhaps?" He looked her up and down as if sizing her up. "We could definitely get you some joke lingerie or some such. We should release it as soon as I convince Fred it's a good idea. Plenty of girls would buy it! I keep telling him, but he doesn't want to listen to me. Genius is never truly appreciated till after you're dead and gone, even when you have a twin brother."

It was a pity, he told himself inside his head. Truly. He was such an amazing madman genius, it was a right tragedy that it went unnoticed. Or, well, it didn't really go unnoticed. People saw it often enough when they walked by the shop or came inside to have a quick peek. George and Fred had done this all together after all. Grinning, he turned back to her. "What kind of pranks do you like?" he asked her politely. "Anything I can sway you to buy for yourself? You should always buy one amazing thing for yourself when shopping for others, I always say."

Words: 493 | Notes: I'm sexy and I know itttt |

[cordeux]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: #000000, width: 300px; height: 300px;] suppose I kept on singing love songs just to break my own fall “Ha! They were amazingly aimed, alright,” Iris replied and punched him lightly in the shoulder. “Either you or Fred hit one into me my seventh year and got me a trip to the hospital wing for a fractured collarbone. Madame Pomfrey said it wouldn’t have been so bad if I hadn’t fallen off my broom. I’m surprised I’m in here after that sort of attack on my person.” Obviously there were no hard feelings. Injuries were bound to happen when playing Quidditch and those who participated in the game understood that. It wasn’t the sort of sport for a priss. “Oooohhhh, aaahhhhh,” she gasped, looking around as though everything she laid her eyes upon was the most magical and brilliant thing she had ever seen in her life. If he was going to act like a tour guide, she was going to play the part of the overly-enthused tourist. Since there was only one of her, that meant she had to make up for the missing tourists. However, she had to admit that the twins had done well for themselves and were not unlike mad geniuses. It was amazing to see all of their inventions spread out across the store when, during school, she hadn’t really put much thought towards the things they used in their pranks. “I think I’ll pick up this love potion for her,” she grabbed one of the bottles and examined it, swirling it around a bit in the light. It was a rather lovely pink, so she assumed that their top buyers of the product were indeed female. “Though I am of the opinion that romance should be a mutual sort of thing, this could provide a rather humorous situation for me. How long does it take to wear off?” Iris inspected the whoopee cushions curiously, amused by them. They were a little too immature for most of her friends, and though her father would appreciate it, her mother would have her head. Then again, she didn’t live at home and her da could use a bit of humor in his life. She picked up one of the packaged ones and slid it under her arm carefully. “No boyfriend,” she told him easily enough. “My cat might get jealous and I have to live with him. It would be quite problematic, you see. He could sit on my face and suffocate me while I sleep. I think I heard something about an amusing set of Wizard’s chess that the two of you made. I have a friend who might enjoy it or try to throttle me when she finds it at the end of her bed. You wouldn’t happen to have any in stock, would you?” While perusing the wares around her, Iris thought about his last suggestion. She wasn’t usually the type to prank others, mostly because her life revolved around working and fencing at the moment. Sometimes she went out with friends, but she’d wanted to put a nice cushion of money in her bank vault before letting herself do some of the fun things she wasn’t able to when living at home. “Anything Quidditch-related?” She finally caved. He was right, even though he was using a basic sales technique. Every now and then it was alright to buy herself something silly or something she wanted. © melly welly at caution 2.0 & LYRICS BY REGINA SPEKTOR So excited for the plots we talked about! You giant squid, you. ;D

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[george]

you spin me right 'round, baby, right 'round

"Now I'm sure that wasn't me," George teased. "I would never harm a lady knowingly! Fred, however, is a brute. An uglier brute than myself, that is." Grinning, George turned to face her. He couldn't remember honestly who had been the one to do it. All of the games he had played in at one time had now blurred together over the years. It just didn't come to him as easily as it used to. Shrugging it off mentally, he turned back to the wall of goodies he had previously been about to speak to her about.

"A love potion, eh? That's what your friends are into? What kind of friends do you have these days?" He waggled his eyebrows at her. Of course that was one of his most popular items among the ladies. Every woman thought it would make a man fall in love with her forever, but you had to keep feeding them the drinks or else the guy would hilariously realize what was going on. It was a bit on the pricey side, so no girl could afford to keep buying them to feed to their guys. Quite obviously that made it hilarious for others to watch as the man fell out of love with a jolt, and came to terms with what had just happened. "It wears off in about a few hours. It doesn't last very long. Depends on their weight, and all that confusing math mumbo jumbo. Typically only four to six hours though."

"Your cat, huh?" He raised his brows at her. "Mr. Whiskers?" He was starting to notice he was asking far too many questions. If he wasn't careful, Iris might start to tease him. He was curious about her however. He hadn't spoken to her in ages and it felt like he had a lot of catching up to do. He did remember one time her telling him her cat's name though. He was pretty certain it was Mr. Whiskers. Or maybe that was Gin saying what she would have named a cat if she had gotten one... huh, George just could not remember now.

"We do happen to have some," he told her and then yelled over to the girl working the counter to grab one from the back. "We ran out last night, and we hadn't gotten around to refilling the shelf. She'll grab one and then you can buy it. They're amazing. Bit brilliant of Fred and I to create them. But genius is as genius does, right?" He winked at her and then held out his hands to take the chess set from the worker, thanking her before handing it back to Iris. "What do you think?" It was in a black box with gold detailing, a clear plastic cover over the top so you could see the chess set.

"We have not gotten around to Quidditch-related items yet, no." George finally had something he could not offer her. He was just shaking his head when he offered, "We're working on it though. You'll have to come back some time to check if we have them up and running. You know, swing by the shop every once in awhile, stick your head in, say hello, look around." It was his way of seeing if she'd agree to come around more often, without really sticking his neck out there. Would it sound like he was interested in her? He was. He wondered if he should just come right out and ask her on a date...

Words: 588 | Notes: WE GOT A BADASS OVER HUUUUUR|

[cordeux]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: #000000, width: 300px; height: 300px;] suppose I kept on singing love songs just to break my own fall “Alright, they’re not entirely into love potions,” Iris told him and laughed. “However, she is smitten with this one boy, and I think he’s good-natured enough to not get angry at her for slipping him a love potion. Besides the fact that it will be quite amusing for me. It’s not really my fault if she decides to give it to him, anyway. I bought it as a gag gift from a joke shop, after all. I believe that clears me of all guilt.” Or, of course, she could give it to one of those girls she disliked that were still at school and see what fun happened when it wore off the guy she slipped it to. The possibilities were limitless. “You know, a lady should never reveal too many of her secrets, you impertinent kid,” she teased him. “It makes her less mysterious. If I tell you everything, such as the super secret ceremony where my cat got his name, who’s to say you’re still going to be interested in me? That’s practically what makes up my entire personality and history. However, yes his name is Mr. Whiskers. Good going, George. Gold star material, most definitely.” She took the chess set when it was handed to her and examined it, a grin spreading across her face. “That’s brilliant! Eir will appreciate this, I think, or use it to smash me over the head with. I’ll have to go into hiding once I send this one out.” Since her hands were getting full, she went over to the counter to set everything down. She especially didn’t want to accidentally break the vial that the love potion was in, suspecting that the fumes might make all of them a little silly, not to mention that she would have to pay for it. “I’ll definitely have to swing by to check and see if you get anything in stock, then,” Iris tucked a strand of hair behind her ears absently. “I know a few people I could gift something like that to, and it would be fantastic to have for myself. Maybe a little golden snitch to wander around the house? It would be great if you could make one that does this horrible noise… I could set one loose at my friend’s and see what chaos it created as everyone tried to catch it…” She shook her head and chuckled at the mental picture. Then, on a whim, she voiced an idea that had popped into her head. “Do you want to go out sometime?” She asked. “You know, maybe out to lunch or dinner some night.” © melly welly at caution 2.0 & LYRICS BY REGINA SPEKTOR are you even allowed to say that on this site? LOL

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[george]

you spin me right 'round, baby, right 'round

George wished he could figure out what she was thinking. The look on her face as she talked about the love potion was delicious. He knew she was probably thinking about things she could do personally with that love potion for the highest amusement value. "You can never be held responsible for what someone decides to do with a gag gift," he agreed with her easily enough. "They could decide to do a number of random, crazy things. Who are you to control them? Free will and all that jazz." George grined at her.

George threw his head back and laughed. "You go on and on about not telling me, then come right out with it like it's no big deal! You, my good lady, are an impeccable actress." Oh she was good. She had gotten him to laugh. He had been expecting her to smoothly transition into another topic, not to give up and tell him the name of her cat. Mr. Whiskers probably found her just as amusing-- or he would, if he wasn't a cat and most cats had bad humors.

"I didn't know the name of your cat composed your personality," he admitted. He had always thought that was how you were raised, your family, your personality, your history. Never what you decided to name your fluffy kitten when you first adopted it. Girls were different from guys, however, so what was George to say was right and wrong? You learned something new everyday, he rationalized.

George grinned. "Why would she smash your head with it? If it's a friend of yours who was in the same house, wouldn't she enjoy a good wizard's chess board?" He raised his brows at her as he followed her to the counter. He had always thought Ravenclaws loved the game the most. It was a good way to match wits with someone after all. George leaned against the counter next to her, his face turned to peer at her own.

George had never thought of that. A golden snitch that would make annoying, horrible noises and wander around someone's house until they caught it. Even then they could make them solve a horribly hard puzzle or riddle before it ended, that would be all the greater. He smiled at her, impressed. "That's a good idea," he complimented. "Of course I'm going to have to take it and tweak it so you can't sue me for ownership." He winked at her, leaning forward and laughing lightly. Yeah, he would have to tell Fred that one. He would get a kick out of it as well.

To say he was shocked was an understatement. He had never thought she would end up being the one to ask him to hang out outside of this, outside of seeing each other at the store or bumping into each other. A smile was slowly dawning across his lips, pulling them apart to reveal white teeth as his eyes glittered. "I would love that," he told her amiably. "We should owl each other and set up a time, a place. I'm sure you'll have to check your schedule, as will I." He didn't want to act too eager, she might think he was a total recluse. Though running this store with just one staff member and Fred did make it so that he never really had free time.

"What do you think? We could owl a little, figure out what works and all."

Words: 578 | Notes: A SNITCH THAT SCREAMS OUT CURSE WORDS|

[cordeux]

[atrb=border,0,true][atrb=style, background-color: #000000, width: 300px; height: 300px;] suppose I kept on singing love songs just to break my own fall “I try,” she told him and laughed. “You know, when I was a little girl I used to want to be an actress in movies or.. Er, well on stage or things like that.” He probably didn’t know what a movie was, so she hastily added in those things to compensate for that lack of knowledge. “I’m glad you approve of my performance.” The girl who was manning the counter seemed rather unimpressed with either the flirting, the conversation, or both, and rang up all the purchases. She interrupted to list off the total cost and Iris dug in her bag for the correct number of galleons and sickles to slide over, receiving her change a few seconds later. Well, at least the girl was efficient. Iris tried to keep a straight face as she replied to him. “Yes,” she told him solemnly. “It’s a very important part of a girl’s life--” And then she broke down into giggles, pleased and surprised that he had actually taken her seriously on that one. Really, of all people to fall for it, George Weasley had not been on her list. She was the one who was supposed to have blonde moments, wasn’t she? Poor man. “Well, depending on what it does, she might either laugh or be extremely livid with me,” Iris murmured, watching the girl carefully wrap her items (though obviously not the pygmy puff) to make sure they didn’t break. The chess set was rather heavy, after all. “I doubt she’d disown me though.” She flashed a grin and propped her elbow on the counter. “Well, Mr. Weasley, I think I might just have to demand royalties from this fantastic idea of mine. I think you could make it even more obnoxious, though. Imagine if, every three to five minutes, it spouted confetti and things everywhere and let off lights?” Then again, she would absolutely murder whoever used this on her, if that ever happened. She took her bags when the woman handed them to her, putting the pygmy on her shoulder where it promptly curled up next to her neck. “I think I’ll name it Georgiana,” she teased. “That sounds swell,” she continued and her grin widened. “I’ll shoot you off an owl as soon as I get home and let you know.” © melly welly at caution 2.0 & LYRICS BY REGINA SPEKTOR Here you go. I think the thread is almost done lol

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[george]

you spin me right 'round, baby, right 'round

"You did?" George was surprised, to say the least. She would have been a wonderful actress. She could hold a straight face incredibly well, and she could say a joke without batting an eye about what was coming out of her mouth. He had seen many a time how she reacted around Oliver and that had always made him roar with laughter. The man was dense, and sometimes he didn't realize when Iris was joking or not. "You would have been an amazing actress, you know."

He watched as Verity rung up Iris's purchases. He could tell the girl wasn't even paying attention to either of them. She was probably boredly thinking about other things in her head. She always talked about how she liked to shop. She was probably trying to figure out the next store she would go to after work. George had a suspicion she blew all of her money on shoes and never bought anything else. Her robes were patched, but her shoes were always brand new and fabulous.

He dragged his mind away from that and looked back at Iris. George smiled at her giggling. He hadn't actually thought she was serious, but he was willing to look a fool if it got her to laugh like that. George wasn't one to care if someone thought he was foolish over how he talked or acted. He had long since discarded the notion of pride for the sake of making people laugh. It was what was so great about him being a jokester. He didn't care if he looked stupid or people mocked him; as long as people enjoyed what he did and he got people to laugh, he didn't much mind.

"Oh, it doesn't do much," he told her reassuringly. "It's surprisingly dull compared to our other sets." He studied the chess set as it was wrapped, then grinned. "It only belches every time it hits another piece and it farts when it drags it to the side." He was sure that her friend probably wouldn't find that amusing, but whoever was playing with her just might. He supposed Iris would find out when they sent her a Howler?

"That is a brilliant idea. You just keep surprising me. Should I get out a notebook and scribble notes from your genius?" He would too, and he would hunch over it breathing heavily and stare at her like a little nerd boy who had found a goddess. It would be hilarious. If he had buck teeth, it would be even better. "I was also thinking there can be a model that spews random profanity. I would find that hilarious. It could even drag people's underwear about the house or something. Anything for a laugh, right?"

"Alright," he agreed and smiled. "I'll walk you to the door, miss!" He swept her a bow and held out a hand towards the door, then began walking with her. "Don't be a stranger now. Come on in whenever you feel like it. I'll be sure to shoot you an owl when we get that Quidditch merch up and running."

Words: 519 | Notes: You can send George a sext owl. NO JUST KIDDING LOL|