{after all this time

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Charlie wasn’t one to believe in fate. There were many bad things that happened to good people, and it wasn’t in his mind set to think that fate would be so cruel. Charlie believed in things happening for a reason, but even then his mindset on that was lenient. Some bad things happened to good people to make them stronger, to force them to evolve into a better person in the end. Some good things happened to bad people because, well... Charlie wasn’t so sure. That’s where his mindset was flawed.

Today was an odd day. It had started out the same as it always did: get up, get dressed, have some breakfast. It was one of his rare days off, and he had no plans to waste it. He’d been attempting to weed the front of his cabin-- a bad idea, these weeds would be the death of him-- when he suddenly realized he hadn’t left Romania in ages. He hadn’t seen his family, been to Diagon Alley, nothing in months. He’d been cooped up here, attempting when he could to sway people to join the Order, but otherwise just working and breathing. That’s it; nothing more exciting was going on in Charlie Weasley’s life at this moment.

Now that just won’t do! Pulling the gloves off his hands and throwing them in with the weeds, he pushed himself to his feet and dusted off his pants. He’d have to go find something to do in England for a bit, maybe go knock back some drinks in the old Leaky Cauldron. Thinking about that-- actually feeling it solidify as a plan in his head-- made him feel good. He had an agenda; he wasn’t just going to wander aimlessly around his cabin and hope that something cropped up for him to do. No! Today, Charlie was a man on a mission.

Repressing the urge to start humming an exciting diddy to himself, he took the stairs to his front door three at a time (and nearly fell backwards onto his head because of it) to go change into clean clothes. He wasn’t going to head out in these dusty, ratty old things! What if he saw someone from his old days at Hogwarts? They’d think he was a bum. He was quite happy in life (well, as happy as he figured he had any right to be) and even though a war was going on, his life hadn’t gone completely down the shitter. His family were all safe for the most part, no one had lost their lives, and You-Know-Who hadn’t completely taken over (yet).

As soon as he had changed he set out to go to the designated grounds for apparating. They’d had to put up rules and spells to prevent people from doing so near dragons; it was all for safety’s sake after the first person nearly got eaten. Shaking his head at the memory, Charlie walked along by himself and enjoyed the sunlight on his skin. He got very rare chances to have moments like this, and when they did come along he tended to savor them. Yes, going into London sounded like a fantastic idea and he was rather glad it had come to him so easily. Usually he had to sit in his cabin for hours trying to think up something to do! He was probably a very boring, plain person, wasn’t he? Dragons, dragons, and even more dragons! That’s most of his topic conversation starters of choice.

It didn’t take long to get near the Leaky Cauldron (apparating really helped loads). Charlie studied it from the street as muggles brushed past him, his eyes far away and a small smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He hadn’t been here in at least a year, he was quite certain. It felt strange to stand here in front of it and wondered who he’d find inside. Anyone he knew? Probably not; he didn’t kn0w a whole lot of people to begin with, and the ones he did know probably wouldn’t be in the Leaky Cauldron at this time of day. They all had regular jobs and schedules and families and things to do, quite unlike Charlie.

While he had been lost in thought, he hadn’t noticed he had begun to walk towards the front door. Opening it and listening to the small sound it emitted to notify the employees he had entered, he shut it behind him with a soft thud and took a moment for his eyes to adjust. He didn’t see anyone he noticed, and there weren’t a whole lot of people so early in the day. His eyes studied each person, before he shrugged it off. He’d just grab something to eat, before going through Diagon Alley. There were a few things he’d like to pick up while he was here. Breakfast had been hours ago, and his stomach was just beginning to grumble again for more food. He was sure the menu was limited, but they were bound to have something he could scarf down before moving on.

Sitting quietly down in a corner of the room, Charlie waited patiently to be noticed and approached. He didn’t mind the wait. It was kind of nice to be out of Romania. Maybe while he was at it, later on in the day, he’d go visit his parents. They’d probably be tickled pink over that. He usually only showed up for holidays and such.


Words: 913
Tag: Jocelyn
Notes: I'll code this later and make it pretty. For now though here's the first post! If you need me to change anything, let me know. (;

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It was your typical early afternoon in the Leaky Cauldron for Jocelyn, the usual locals and regulars sitting over their coffees and beers, the overwhelmed and tired shopping mum just returning from her trip to Diagon Alley with or without kids, glad to rest her feet for a short while and exchange the newest gossip. And gossip there was of course, with the latest happenings all around the wizarding world. It had been quiet for a few weeks, but the two attacks on Hogsmeade were still prominent in people’s minds. Jocelyn could not blame them. It HAD be devastating, but at least it had helped her to find out her place in all of this – and it was with the resistance, the fighting side. She had finally worked up the courage to make contact to the Order of the Phoenix, and it had paid off. Now, while many people seemed helpless and disorientated, Jocelyn knew exactly what she wanted to do, and she could hardly wait for the next meeting. Her years of dreaming to be part of something grand, of something that mattered and would make a difference, were finally finding a foothold in reality now. There was a thing to fight against and there was a thing to fight for: Freedom of the ever-looming shadow of the Dark Lord, once and for all showing him that he had no place in this world.

“Joce, you are dreaming!”, the goodnatured voice of a regular witch pulled her out of her reverie, towel with which she had polished cups and glasses still in hand. “’m sorry, did you say something?” she asked with a rueful smile, shaking her head as if to clear it. ‘Nothing of importance, dear, but there’s a new customer that might want something to drink”, the middle-aged witch replied merrily and flicked her thumb at a young man in the corner that had just taken a seat. Still somewhat distracted, Jocelyn only threw him a fleeting glance, before tossing the towel on the counter and stepping around the same with a smile. “Okay, I’m gonna quickly get that, and when you return, you must tell me ALL about what your nephew’s been up to, Azalee, I promise I won’t drift off this time!”

With that called-back promise she approached the man in the corner, hoping he wouldn’t have too extraordinary a wish. The closer she came though, the more prominent became the feeling that she knew him, or at least SHOULD know him. He wasn’t a regular though, she could tell them all apart in her sleep if that was what she ought to do, and therefore she wondered why he seemed so oddly familiar. Brushing it away, she closed the gap and put on a smile. “Hey there, what can I—“ she started with her usual customer’s voice, but then her eyes adjusted on him for real for the first time, and the sounds just stuck in her throat.

Charlie. There was no mistaking him from up close, even after all this time. Thrice-darned Charlie Weasley was sitting in the Leaky Cauldron. And she had no idea how to deal with this sudden realization. No idea at all. The “… do for you” was pressed out between her lips, she did not know how. Hopefully it was audible. Goodness, she needed to get a grip on herself and fast! It was just the surprise, that was all. After all, wasn’t he supposed to be in Romania? He probably had long since forgotten about her, and would wonder now what had made her start. Yeah, that was it!

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Charlie blinked in surprise and turned to peer up at the woman standing next to his table. That was fast! He hadn’t thought anyone would wander over for at least another few minutes. Last time he had been here-- though admittedly that was quite awhile ago-- it had taken them ages to finally come over. He studied the woman and his brows furrowed together, as his brain sluggishly told him that he knew her from somewhere.

But where? Normally Charlie was really good with names and faces, at least with people he saw on a regular basis. That meant that he hadn’t seen this one in quite sometime. Well, if he hadn’t seen them in ages, then that meant that there was a reason, right? He tilted his head a little to the side as he studied her. This girl was a little younger than him, but from appearances alone not by much. He had to have known her in Hogwarts.

A girl like this from Hogwarts...

Oh.

Oh.

It was definitely all clicking into place now. Jocelyn Saddler. He had dated her for a year back before he graduated Hogwarts. Upon graduation, they had broken up (well, he had broken up with her) mostly because he was moving so far away. She would still be in school for another two years, while he was out in the middle of nowhere taming dragons. It just hadn’t seemed fair to her to make her go through something like that. His job kept him so preoccupied and busy, he knew he wouldn’t be able to see her as much as he should.

This wasn’t good. He hadn’t actually spoken with her since the last time: back when they had split up. His face turned a bright shade of red (thanks to his skin tone and hair color, dammit why was he a ginger) and he tried to act normal. Keyword: tried. It wasn’t really working all that well, probably because he couldn’t take his eyes away from her face as he stared at her. It was rather blatant he was taken by surprise and his tongue was all wrapped up, refusing to work properly.

How was one supposed to act in a situation like this? He wasn’t sure. Did he pretend not to realize who she was, and place an order? Did he acknowledge her but pretend the breakup hadn’t taken place? What was he supposed to do!? Ugh, this was why he was such a good Dragonologist. He dealt with dragons better than humans. Human emotions, social niceties, etiquette and all those things just didn’t fit into his daily schedule. He was going to have to wing it, which pretty much meant somehow he was going to tick her off or hurt her feelings or possibly both.

Great.

“I, uh.” Well, he couldn’t pretend not to realize who she was now. He was stuttering and making a complete fool of himself. “I came in here cause I wanted to grab some lunch,” he muttered as he looked down at the table. Come on, Charlie! Face the woman. You stared down dragons who breathed fire at you every day, but you couldn’t look at your own damn ex!? She was the only woman you had ever dated, for crying out loud. Which was probably why this was so freaking hard.

He looked back up at her with a small frown. “Jocelyn,” he finally greeted, showing he realized who she was. He just wasn’t going to get out of this one. “It’s been awhile. How have you been?” She looked good. She looked better than good, but Charlie was attempting to ignore that fact. She probably hated him. If Charlie was in her shoes he’d hate him. Gods, he should have just went and had some ice cream!

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She did not want it, but she could not help it. The minute she realized who he was, all the memories were coming back to her. Good grief, what was it, six years? Seven? Jocelyn was twenty-two now, a young woman and not a blue-eyed girl anymore (not that her eyes had ever been blue…), and yet the moment she looked into these eyes, she was fifteen again. Fifteen and hopelessly confused, with emotions making flic-flacs inside her heart and mind. Just like a very risky Parkour move that made your head spin, before you dared to embark on the journey. But just like with Parkour, there was no turning back. No escape, else you were a coward. The way to act was bee-line, no ifs or buts. And she would tackle this situation head-on if need be and try to go through it with as much grace and dignity as she could muster. You deemed it, now do it! she pumped herself up with the old Parkours motto.

And yet… why was she not feeling the determination? Jocelyn felt everything else to be honest, she felt confusion and overall, anger. How dare he walk back into her life just like that?! Given he might not have known she was serving in the Leaky Cauldron and he had as much right to be here than any other wizard, but still, why had it to be her shift?! WHY?! Who had been scheming this?! Who please had written the script to that scene, it was complete rubbish! Even though she knew it wasn’t so, Jocelyn felt like the whole pub had their eyes on Charlie and her now, and the air was sizzling with the tension, everyone waiting for… yeah, for what?! What was there to wait for? Charlie was doing his best of not even looking at her, stuttering like a little schoolboy, and here she was herself, not knowing what to say. Why, oh why?! Couldn’t he have just stayed in Romania? Couldn’t she have had a different shift this night? Her aunt Tatty in her craziness firmly believed in fate and that everything happened for a reason, but what was the reasom behind this unwanted meeting? They were both just annoying each other, and it shouldn’t even affect her that much. Charlie had been gone from her life for six years, that was a long time, enough time to get to terms with it and grow up. Just that Jocelyn Saddler never really grew up. Out of sight, out of mind… but in sight, in mind? Apparently so!

Too late, far too late she realized that it just might be her turn to say something. He had been asking for lunch, had he not? Her first impulse was to tell him to go and eat something poisonous, but she found that she had not enough anger in her for that after all. There was too much confusion crowding it out. Great…! “Uh… yeah, sure. What do you want? Lamb stew’s recommended today.” Professional. Yeah, they would just go through this professionally. He was a customer, she was the barmaid for today. Nothing more. Let’s just not get personal…
… Too late.
He, he out of them both had the nerve to ask how she had been?! This was just… oh it was typically him! Talk first, think later! The dragons surely loved it! That he still was in one piece – and a quite good looking piece – was a miracle. She had a right mind to spew fire as well, but she pulled herself together. Six years… it was the past. Jocelyn Saddler never lived in the past. She was a barricade girl, not such a lovesick fool as Marius Pontmercy!

“I’ve been alright, I guess. Been around, up to no good as always.” She replied, a trying the slightest of smiles, though it was a very poor and thin try. “How fare the dragons?” Blasted dragons. Couldn’t they all just go extinct? Who needed dragons?!

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Charlie felt like an idiot. Not that that was any different from how he usually felt in social situations, but still. Sitting here, peering up at his ex-girlfriend, he wondered what was going through her head. Surely she was angry with him? He’d be pissed off with him. If he ordered that lamb stew she’d probably dump it down the front of his shirt. He wouldn’t blame her for it, oh no. He deserved it, he was quite certain. Though thinking of it Jocelyn probably wouldn’t risk her job just to do something like that to an old flame from almost six years ago. Was it six years? Gosh, the years had surely flown by but Jocelyn looked even better because of them.

Charlie, pull it together, man!

“U-uh,” he muttered. Great, he was stuttering now. Did she really have such a profound effect on him? It had been six years, and he still felt like a schoolboy sitting here in front of her. It didn’t make any sense to him! Then again, when it came to matters of the heart, what was supposed to make sense? “I’ll have the lamb stew,” he finally told her. It sounded like the best course of action at the moment. Plus he was rather hungry and anything would sound good, so he’d just go with the first thing offered. Good enough for him. It was probably loads better than his own home cooking anyhow.

He probably shouldn't have asked her how she was, now that he thought about it. The look she had there for a moment truly frightened him. Was she thinking of murdering him or worse? He was sure there were worse things than death. Death was scary because of the unknown but it was permanent. Once it was done, it was over with. There wasn’t anything else scary about death. He waited patiently to see if she would respond or tell him to take a hike. He was betting on the taking a hike part.

Up to no good as always? That actually nearly made a smile appear, but he managed to suppress it. He had a feeling she wouldn’t want him to laugh or smile, because it could be taken as mocking and condescending. That was as far from the truth as possible. The dragons. She asked about the dragons. He had figured she would avoid the topic, since they were the reason they had broken up in the first place, but he had been wrong. Why was he always wrong when it came to Jocelyn Saddler?

“The dragons fare fine,” he responded lightly. He was attempting nonchalance but he wasn’t sure how well his facade was working. He probably wasn’t fooling her in the slightest. “We just had one lay eggs for new baby dragons. They should hatch healthy and raring to go.” She probably wasn’t interested in his answer, but baby dragons always worked him up into a lather. He thought they were cute! No one else ever seemed to think the little monsters were, but Charlie Weasley thought they were adorable.

He should probably get his head checked.

“H-how long have you worked for the Leaky Cauldron?” That was a polite thing to ask, right? He hadn’t even known she worked here in the first place. He had thought she’d be out crusading for some grand cause by now, saving the world and helping people in distress. Goals changed though. Perhaps hers had as well?

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Lamb stew it was then… Lamb to the slaughter, Jocelyn thought glumly for a split second, before she realized what she was doing. Goodness, what was wrong with her?! Charlie surely didn’t deserve to have such an effect on her. People crossed paths with their exes all the time, and they probably were dealing far better with it than she was right now. It was enough he still hogged the space of her best memory, he shouldn’t claim even more space in her mind! Where would that lead anyway? After this beer he would return to Romania and continue working with his dragons, and it was a good thing he did that. Jocelyn knew herself too well, she knew she might end up hoping against all hope with every day that he would be walking through this door again. And she did not want that. This was her work, the Leaky Cauldron had become a little space all for herself, where she could be amongst the witches and wizards of every day life, with their hopes and dreams, right at the pulse of time.

She should be going now, return to the bar and issue the order of lamb stew verbally, and yet Jocelyn found herself scribbling the words on a piece of paper and issueing the order towards the kitchen in a memo charm, the same that could be seen to be used all over the Ministry between the different departments. The kitchen would receive it and prepare the rest, only call her once the stew was prepared. But why she had robbed herself of that easy method to escape this blasted situation Jocelyn did not know herself. “Be up in a moment I guess. Anything to drink?” she inquired further, feeling safe with the usual questions. Anything to keep herself from lashing out at him now.

He spoke more about his blasted dragons now as she had asked about them, and Jocelyn found herself listening almost against her will. She was not the type of girl to squee at the mentioning of baby dragons, but she could not help the amused, almost fond smile that flickered over her face as she thought about the little thing. Would it look more comical than ferocious at first? Probably, but that was of course not important. He should not think he could lure her in with such talk… Not that he probably even had wanted that, he might not even think about impressing her. No, of course, it was and it would always be only about the dragons. Period.
”Never drop that hint to Hagrid though or he might come after you”, she commented with only partly forced gaity. “It’s no secret after all he always wanted a baby dragon. He’s been telling that to me all throughout the school years, and when you told him what you wanted to do… I could see green envy in his eyes.”

Jocelyn didn’t like to be remembered of that one time… One of Charlie’s last visits to Hagrid before his graduation, and Jocelyn had been there, too. It was then when Jocelyn had first realized how serious he was with his plans about going to Romania, before she had only viewed it as the dreams of one who still had his head in the clouds from too much Quidditch. But the fire in his eyes when he had spoken about it… there and then, she had first realized she would lose him. But that was past now! She had turned her back on all of this, and just because he was here now didn’t mean she had to relive it, right? But it seemed, whatever topic they started, whatever they tried, they would always come back to their break-up. How positively cliché!

And now this question… it was an easy one, just a time issue, and yet she could almost feel the other question behind it. Why are you working here when all you ever wanted to do is change the world into a better place? Well, I am not owing you any explanation about my life plan, Charlie, she thought grimly. You least of all people!
“It’s been almost three years now”, she answered, shrugging. “There’s not many slots open for heroes on hire… or revolutionaries. Whatever you might want to call it. If I don't want to be a hypocrite and live of my parents' dirty money, I can only work for myself. And better here than behind some desk."

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For a moment there, Charlie could have sworn he saw blood lust in her eyes. Just a moment. He managed to force a smile to his lips as he asked for a water. “A bit too early for me to start drinking,” he told her as if he had to explain himself. Not everyone who came into the Leaky Cauldron did so to drink, right? It wasn’t like he was an odd one out. He hoped. It was still early afternoon, so he wasn’t quite ready to hit back any alcoholic beverages quite yet. “So water will do just fine.”

Maybe it would do best to steer the conversation away from dragons. He did break things off with her because of him pursuing his career after all, so it was quite possible she didn’t enjoy the topic. She had asked him how he was doing, and dragons went hand-in-hand with that though. So wasn’t it alright to continue to pursue this topic? He wasn’t sure. Social normalities escaped him on a regular basis. He supposed if she didn’t want to talk about it she would make it rather apparent. Perhaps she would do such a 180 for a topic change that it would be clear that she didn’t want to speak about dragons any longer. Jocelyn had never been one to leave him hanging when he was wondering something.

He had expected her to leave though, after she had taken his order. Instead she had sent the little paper off to the kitchens and stayed right where she was. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to talk with her; far from it, he was overly curious to know what she had been doing all these years and how she was. He wanted to know everything; did she still speak with her family? Did she obtain what she wanted out of life? Was she happy here? Did she miss him? No, that last question was something purely selfish and it would never see the light of day. Charlie wasn’t one to dredge up old memories and feelings like that if he could avoid it. He could definitely avoid it in this situation.

“Hagrid had looked rather envious, hadn’t he?” Charlie asked and a small smile tilted up the corners of his lips. Just remembering it almost caused him to chuckle. He was sure if Hagrid had had the chance he would have pursued the same job. It was a pity that he never got the chance to. But thinking about how he had gone and told Hagrid made him think about when Jocelyn and he were still together, when he had ended things with her and how they had all fallen apart. They hadn’t spoken in six years; obviously things had taken a turn for the worst. Though quite possibly that was all to put on Charlie’s door, because after they had ended things he had felt too awkward to try and keep up communication. Surely she would hate him and make it quite transparent, and he hadn’t wanted to deal with the first woman (and only at this point) he had ever fallen in love with hating him. It had just felt like it would crush him if he had stared that in the face.

“With the war,” he began quietly, “I’m sure there are plenty of chances to be a hero.” He could probably recruit her, or at least try, if she hadn’t joined already. There was no safe way to ask her, not in this crowded bar. He couldn’t take the chance and inform anyone close by that he was part of the Order, part of the fight. Knowing her though he was sure if she knew about the Order then she would have joined. He pondered if she had joined. He hadn’t been to any of the meetings lately. If he had, would he have seen her there?

“This job doesn’t seem all that bad,” he told her. He didn’t want her to think he was pitying her, because he wasn’t. He thought that this kind of job actually rather suited her above any Ministry or desk job. This would be far more enjoyable than being cooped up behind a desk, slaving away at papers for a living. “Do you at least like working here? Three years, that’s a rather long time.”

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This time, Jocelyn took the order directly, as she was responsible, and nodding, she returned to the bar to fetch him his water. Her face, altough she tried hard to keep it civil and unmoving, must have given away something, as she was directly addressed by the nosy Azalee, who had eavesdropped in on the conversation. “Something the matter, sweetie?” she asked, sounding concerned, though Jocelyn know she might as well be just interested in a good story to pass on. There was no greater gossiper she had ever met than Azalee Merriweather. “Do you know the young man there?”
“He is a friend from school times, and no, nothing’s the matter”, Jocelyn lied as smoothly as she could. “Just haven’t seen each other in a few years. He’s been abroad.” She hoped to satisfy the woman’s curiosity with that little information that was as close to the truth as she would get without revealing her real involvement in this story. “So-so” was Azalee’s hesistant reply, and Jocelyn could see that she was by no means satisfied and would probably inquire further late. Just. Great!

Walking over to Charlie’s table again, she put the water in front of him with a business-like smile: “Here you are. Hope it’s the temperature you like. Otherwise we can get something cooler or warmer, that’s no problem at all.” Of course, if a wizard was disappointed with his drink’s temperature, there were easy ways to remedy it by a spell. She had seen it done often in here, and it never failed to make her smile. How wonderfully easy working in a place as the Leaky Cauldron could be for a barmaid! For usually, before they bothered to complain, they changed it themselves.
Oh, why did he have to smile?! It was that smile that brought back all the memories of their time together. He had smiled like that when winning a match for Gryffindor, he had smiled like that, this hint of amusement, when he had listened to her droning on about her revolutions and how she wanted to change the world. It was this smile that had made her fall for him in the first place…

Ah, this had to stop! Even as she was trying to deny it, her thoughts were wandering down that road again, the road of memories and upflaming desire. And he didn’t deserve any of it, he had left, he had willingly thrown away all claims on her, so he should not think she would still be waiting for him. That’d be the day!
“Well, I can’t seem to understand you both then”, she retorted drily, but was very glad there was no tint of bitterness in her voice. “I mean, seriously, can you TELL me what’s so wonderful about dragons? They’re quite some dangerous beasts, and they could just tread on you accidently, even if they liked you.” No, Jocelyn really couldn’t see so much in dragons, but she knew there had to be something if Charlie was so utterly thrilled. She also envied him a little, he knew exactly what he wanted in life and he pursued it against all odds. And her?! Her high ideals often enough left her high and dry. Nowadays, there just didn’t seem to be a place for revolutionaries and heroes. People had grown so accustomed to their world that they didn’t want to change it. Not even those who had all the rights to.

He was right about the war of course, it was a war again, and a war needed devoted fighters against the dark side. Jocelyn was ready for that – but what has HIS business with it?! He was hiding away in Romania and played with dragons. “I suppose you are right”, she replied equally quietly, “I will certainly not stand back and watch, that has never been my style.” More, she could and would not tell him, not now and perhaps not ever. It was his choice if he wanted to get involved as well, but since many of his family were, there was a high propability.

“Oh, make no mistake, I love it here”, she told him, feeling a smile creep over her face. A true smile, not bitter, not reserved. Charlie was beginning to crack her shell once again, but at this very moment, she didn’t even mind. “Revolutions always start in places where people gather over their evening beer. Because it is there and then they voice their opinions, it is there and then where the best ideas are founded. And you don’t find true friends in the halls and parlours of the mighty, because there everyone wears a mask.” She made a wide gesture about the whole taproom. “Not so in the Leaky Cauldron. Here everyone is just themselves, and that is more powerful than any disguise could ever be.” She gave a little laugh and shook her head. “All those things aside, I really like it here. Though it’s not what I want to do for the rest of my life.” If only she knew WHAT that would be she wanted to do instead.

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As Jocelyn left to take his order of water to the bar, Charlie was caught up in his own thoughts. His head felt murky with thoughts that hadn’t occurred to him for years, and he kept wondering if maybe he should just get up and leave. Jocelyn probably didn’t want him around; they hadn’t parted on the best terms. He knew he was making a mistake when he had ended it so abruptly like he had, but he also had realized that it had to be done. Moving to Romania had been hard on him and his family, how would it have gone with Jocelyn as his girlfriend?

He tapped his fingers idly on the wood tabletop, looking anywhere but towards the bar. Maybe she was telling the woman he saw speak to her that he was an awful git. She’d have every right to, wouldn’t she? Charlie hated social interactions only because of this. Sure, when he had been in school and been sorted into Gryffindor he had been good with this stuff! He’d thrived on talking to people and he’d been brave. Heck, he was still courageous, he faced dragons every day for his job! But facing an ex? Nope, now he was almost quaking in his boots!

He took a sip from his drink and then nodded his head. “The water’s fine,” he told her. He didn’t have a particular care about his water like other people. It could be warm, room temperature or cold and he’d be just as pleased. He’d had to get used to not asking for too much while working with dragons and living out in Romania. He was used to far worse conditions by now. Besides if he wanted to he could just do a quick spell and be done with it; he was sure Jocelyn realized that too. You couldn’t work at a bar like this and not have people doing that sort of thing all the time.

“What’s wonderful about dragons?” Charlie asked and he gaped at her for a moment before reeling his emotions in. He always forgot not everyone was like him. Not everyone loved dragons so much they devoted their lives to them and nearly lived and breathed them every day. He took a moment to think this question over, allowing it to percolate in his brain. “It’s something I’ve always been fascinated by,” he finally began. “When I was still at Hogwarts, I’d read books upon books of magical creatures, but it was always dragons that I went back to without fail. The way they live, breed, fly, everything about them seems to stir up my curiosity. I want to know as much as I possibly can about them and more. I want to help them live without encroaching on them too much, and I want to protect them from people that would want to do them harm.” He shrugged and could feel the tingle of a blush in his cheeks. “I just really like dragons.”

He had never viewed the bar quite like she was explaining it. She was right though, wasn’t she? Looking around, the few patrons who were here weren’t pretending to be someone they weren’t. They were being themselves. He was not doing that only because Jocelyn was here and they had a history together, something that prevented him from cutting loose and being his normal self. He was too self conscious to do that right now because he felt so awkward around her. Not seeing someone for six years would do that to a person though, he supposed.

There was one thought left to flutter in his brain; was he allowed to ask her what she wanted to do for the rest of her life? He was a bit curious to find out, because she hadn’t known last time they had spoken to each other. Perhaps she was working towards that goal right now, or just figuring out a game plan while she was occupied here. Who knows? “What do you want to do for the rest of your life?” He asked and he attempted as best as he could go make it sound only of polite curiosity. He didn’t want her to get offended with him for asking and wander off.

It had always been like this; Jocelyn fascinated him about as much as dragons did. The way she acted, the way she spoke, the ideals she believed in. He found all of it an enigma he wanted to crack. He had only left her way back when because he had thought it would be for the best, though he was sure she would have argued with him over it. Hell, if he told her that was the reason now she would probably be even more miffed at him and tell him he was a foolish git. Charlie was though. A foolish git, that is.

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Jocelyn had really resigned herself to listen this time, she had posed the question not only as a rhetorical one, she really did want to know. Maybe to draw a line under all of this, she wanted to know once and for all why Charlie had chosen the dragons over her. In the first few weeks after their seperation, she had sometimes told herself that it had only been a lame excuse, that he just had not really loved her and that the work in Romania had proven a welcome opportunity to sort this out. After all, if he had still wanted to be with her, they would have sorted this out. There were long-distance relationships all around the world. But no, he had taken the easy way out, and she had not wanted to beg him to try it. That was not her style. After all, other mothers also had fine sons, wasn’t that the saying? Just that… apart from the occasional flirt and fling, she had found no one else. And a little part of her which she tried desperately to quench wanted to know if he had found someone. Or if he even missed being with someone. He had his dragons after all.

She remembered very well that he had been fascinate by dragons always, and that he had had books about them and the like. But she had taken it for a boy’s fancy, after all, which boy was not fascinated by those creatures? And yet, only the fewest of them really wanted to work with them. Charlie’s last confession was so simple it tore at her heartstrings. It was as if he was pleading her to understand even though there was no real explanation. What a clever trick, really… if it only had been a trick. Charlie was not the type to NOT mean that in its simplicity. It would have been only easier for Jocelyn herself… but apparently she really could not compete with dragons. “It’s a noble cause, I guess”, she nodded, feeling a little like she was trying to grasp Enjolras’ ardent infatuation with revolution and change. In all honesty, she even felt a little jealous for another reason. Charlie knew how he could put his passions into an occupation, he had found his dream job. She just harboured great ideals and dreams, but could do nothing about them. “Seeing as they’re nearly extinct and must never be seen by muggles, you’re doing all you can to preserve them.”

Oh now, that question! Putting his finger right on the sore spot and prodding it. Jocelyn bit her lip and found her usual wit escaping her completely. To anyone else, she would have replied with something flippant, like that she had the highest and best plans on how to start a world revolution and bring everyone under one roof, to live by pure democracy and make away with all the arm deals companies in the world. It was true, a part of her wanted all that… but how COULD one do it?
“I’ll probably invent my own job”, she replied, shrugging. “As there doesn’t seem to be one for what I really want to do. Not in the magical world at least. Seriously, I can’t see myself sitting in the Ministry, or doing that kind of workmanship stuff our society loves to do. I’m also no teacher. I want to make people see how they’re suffocating in the shells they put themselves into. That they’ve grown soft and resigned and THAT is why people like You-Know-Who or muggle dictators can walk all over them.” Her voice, almost detached and polite in the beginning, had grown more passionate with every word that left her mouth, and her eyes were burning now. “I want to fight, Charlie… but not only with my wand. I am not satisfied with preserving what we have against assaults. I want to break up the shells and make things BETTER!”

Taking a deep breath, she realized that her feelings had gotten the better of her, and she gave a helpless shrug. “Now… tell me what kind of job description that fits and I’ll apply for it tomorrow.”

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Charlie wasn’t sure what he should feel when she said his cause was noble, but relief and pleasure mingled together inside of him anyway. It was like the thing he had been worrying about for years was finally easing a little. Though he still felt like he had been horrid when they broke up, he was at least happy that she had admitted his profession was a noble one. He wished they were close enough so he could take her to see the dragons. That’s what he always told himself: if people only saw what he did on a daily basis, they would be as enthralled with the species as Charlie.

It was almost majestic, the way these humongous, heavy creatures took off into the air with no more effort than it took him to lift a foot to step forward. They weighed so much, yet floated in the air as if they were very little. Their scales were strong and their personalities fierce, yet they could be so protective and gentle to their own young. Everything about them seemed as if to scream, “Let’s interest Charlie Weasley as if to madness!” Most times when he was in conversation dragons always somehow came up, and he usually pushed people away because they weren’t as interested as he. If he could pass off some of his passion to another person, perhaps then he would be more normal. But then he would no longer be Charlie Weasley-- not really-- and he’d never allow his interest in dragonology to be kept by another.

There were a lot of things he wished he could put into words with her. Charlie Weasley wasn’t very good with his words though, and therefore some things had to remain unsaid. He didn’t know a way to phrase what he was thinking, nor the feelings he had over dragons. Nor his feelings that he still felt slumbering deep within himself for Jocelyn herself. She probably wouldn’t believe him even if he did find some way to communicate those things to her. He had been a rather foolish young boy when he left her, and though he now understood that he missed her quite terribly he also knew that some things could never be undone. He didn’t think Jocelyn would be able to forgive him, though it wouldn’t hurt to try, would it?

Charlie supposed he could try. He wasn’t a coward. He was a Gryffindor graduate, after all! He was brave and courageous, and he faced dragons every day for a living! Blimey, he had to be able to do something like stare down his ex-girlfriend, right? Or attempt to get closer to her to at least be friends. It would please him so much if he could at least have her back in his life again, if nothing else. When she began speaking about what she wanted to do for the future, he realized the best thing he could possibly do was sit here and lend her an ear. It’d do him good to listen to what she had to say and then try to communicate whatever came to his own mind that might be helpful.

“Invent your own job?” He asked her as he raised his brows. Now that seemed to be just the thing for her actually. He couldn’t see her doing anything boring or mundane; nothing came to mind when he thought of the Ministry, nor a shop job. This job was a placeholder, sure, but he couldn’t see her staying here for the rest of her life. This was to make money and keep ends meeting, to keep cash flowing through to all her bills, nothing more. She needed something to stroke her passion into a flame and cause her to realize what her true desire was. Charlie had been rather lucky when he had stumbled upon his own and realized what he wanted to do. He wished he could rub some of that luck onto her so she wouldn’t have to be so lost in her own path in life.

“Honestly, after that impromptu speech, I wish I could tell you a job you could apply for,” he told her and his lips twitched upwards at the corners. He had forgotten how passionate she could be when you got her started on something she believed in. He had always found it pleasurable to watch the expressions flicker across her face as she spoke. It was still rather nice to watch them do it now, even after six years. “I’m sure you’re going to find your way someday, Jocelyn. I know people probably tell you that all the time, but I believe it. I’ve never known you to give up, and I’m sure finding the career of your dreams is no exception. You’ll find it.”

He breathed in for a moment and then tilted his head a bit, studying her. He wanted to ask her more-- how have you been over the years? what have you been up to? what are your hobbies now, or do you still have the same ones? He wondered if she would accept those questions from him, or deflect them somehow so that she wouldn’t have to answer. He had no right to the answers; they weren’t even friends at this point, were they? Did they have any feelings left for each other? Charlie knew he was still overly fond of her-- he wouldn’t say in love like he had been, the years had dulled that down considerably, but he knew something was still there. Did she feel the same?

“At least for now you have a job,” he supplied. “I know a lot of people who are out of work and hating it. Even though this is just a for now thing, it’s still better than nothing, right?”

He drummed his fingers steadily against the tabletop as he studied her face carefully. He might as well keep up the polite conversation. He was worried if he let a lull come then she would get up and depart. Of course she’d bring his food when the time came, but that would be that. A door would be closed once more that he hadn’t known he had missed being open. Would she want to leave him to his own thoughts and not speak to him again? Be a man, Charlie Weasley! He told himself quickly. Be the courageous Gryffindor everyone always said you were!

“What do you do outside of work?” He asked her in a rush. Damn. He wasn’t very smooth, was he? He wished he was more like his more eloquent brothers. “Any new hobbies, or... do you still do the old ones?” Yeah, his voice was sounding awkward, but he was still rather pleased he got the words out nonetheless. Good going, Charles. Good one.


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Well, she was trying, wasn’t she?! And that while it wasn’t even her obliged to try anything. She had every right to sulk in a corner like every woman scorned. Just that that had never been Jocelyn’s style. She would show him how alright she was by just conversing with him, as if he never had hurt her at all. That was not deceiving, that was acting like a grown woman, was it not? He shouldn’t think he had had that much of an effect on her so she wouldn’t be able to deal with him after seven years of growing out of him. Not to mention of course that it was simply nice to be talking to Charlie again without any strings attached. Just to be here and talk was alright, though the topic was a little less than ideal. But maybe they could move on from dragons to something that was a little more enjoyable for them both – only that the matter of her job or rather the lack thereof wasn’t so much better. No matter what he chose, it ALWAYS seemed to put her on the spot. Merlin, was she really such a failure compared to him? That was at least what her father would say, oh, she was surely a failure in the eyes of everyone apart from maybe Aunt Tatty and her brother. But as long as she still could at look herself in the mirror and be like: ‘yep, that’s the girl I want to be’, there was no need for panic.

It was certainly nice of Charlie to say that he’d wish he could tell her a job. But so far no one offering that had even come remotely near something she might like. That was the problem with it all, Jocelyn knew only what she did NOT want, and that was clear as day: Being confined to something mundane, everyday that would make you think why you were even on earth. And she would never be able to do something that went against her conscience, like dealing with dirty money or with weapons like her father did.
She fought down a wince though when he told her that he knew her as a girl that didn’t give up. Was that sarcasm, irony or simple stupidity? ‘Never giving up, huh?’, she wanted to say, ‘but then I am a girl that gave up… I gave up on you.’ But she did not voice that thought, it would have led nowhere after all. Did she suddenly think it a mistake she had not insisted more? But then he would have thought her needy and clingy, wouldn’t he? And she wanted to be anything but! How could she speak of people’s freedom and a just world and then forbid him to pursue his dreams just so she would be happy? That was not right. But having done the right thing didn’t make it any less lonely. Yes… lonely is the path of the righteous…

Instead, she gave a slightly forced chuckle. “I should have just developed better hobbies you know. My aunt Tatty, you remember her? She’s got herself a magical tattoo studio, doing all those intricate tattoo charms, moving and still. You tell her what you want, and when you come next time, she puts her want to you arm and there goes the ink, weaving itself into a pattern you couldn’t have imagined better. I got myself one too. Of course, for the muggles she also does ‘normal’ tattoos.” Tatty was happy with what she had chosen to do. It was not the best paid job in the world, but she would probably never tire of designing and making tattoos, whether the magical or the muggle way.

His point about people not having any job at all needed no comment. It was simply true, and Jocelyn surely didn’t want to whine. Whining was for ingrateful babies. Why was he so interested in her however?! “Honestly, you could have asked me that in a letter years ago.” It just slipped out, she could do nothing to stop those brutally honest words. “Or are you more the one-on-one type?” Biting her lip she shook her head, looking anywhere but his face for a moment, then she squared her shoulders. Once you mess up, you gather up the mess.
“Sorry, that was kind of a low blow. I still have more or less the same hobbies. Parkours is still my one passion. I managed to get from King’s Cross to Kensington Memorial in a beeline the other week. What do you do if you don’t watch dragons fly?”